Life is Messy

Kindness

“One kind word can warm three winter months.”
– Japanese proverb

Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love. – Lao Tzu

Kindness is not an act. It’s a lifestyle – Cary Grant

Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind. – Henry James

Kindness definition- the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate

It takes so little to make someone’s day. Think about it. How many times has a kind word, a smile or a kind act like someone letting you ahead of them in line at the grocery store lifted your mood? Yesterday, I was at the DMV. While I was waiting for my turn I had a great conversation with a nice lady and generally trying to make best of a long wait. As I was sitting there chatting away, an elderly gentleman came in and got in line. He apparently was having difficulty standing that long and pulled one of the chairs into the line and sat down. The security guard came over to tell him that wasn’t allowed and he appeared to get upset. The man behind him, who at first glance looks like a guy you wouldn’t want to anger, turned to the elderly gentleman and told him to go take a seat and he would hold his place in line for him. Kindness in action. That act also reverberated around the room, you could see everyone smile or hear them whisper how nice the man was. It raised the energy level of a generally frustrated and grumpy room.

Being good to one another is one of the first lessons we learn. “Do unto others….” is called the golden rule for a reason. I think we mean to be kind but often aren’t. This isn’t to say we are mean but that we overlook ways to extend ourselves to others. Perhaps we are just to distracted by our own concerns. Maybe we are anxious or depressed. It’s hard to give to others when you feel empty yourself. Sometimes we are just too busy or think someone else will help. There is something called bystander apathy where individuals are less likely to help someone if others are present. Maybe that’s why cities seem so cold sometimes. Kindness ,though, is contagious and can spread from person to person increasing happiness. It is completely in your control. And, as I mentioned above takes so little. To quote a song I learned in Sunday School : Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me”

Here are some simple ways to cultivate kindness:

Pay a sincere compliment to someone. With social media this is easier than ever. It doesn’t have to be someone you know.

Tell your loved ones how much they mean to you

Compliment someone to their boss.

Let someone ahead of you, in line, or in traffic. You’ll get where you are headed anyway.

Call someone you think might be lonely or going through a difficult time, especially on holidays, birthdays or anniversaries.

Donate blood

Volunteer

Pay for someone’s coffee or toll.

Forgive someone, and mean it.

Help someone new in town.

Babysit and/or run errands for new mom

Volunteer to take group photos for tourists

Hold the door for someone

Take a new co worker to lunch

Donate things you no longer use

Give someone a ride.

Listen

Smile, just because.

These are just a few examples. Feel free to share your own examples.